Dating apps are still where many first dates begin—but the goal is getting off the app and into a real-life meet-up that feels safe, low-pressure, and fun. If you’re rusty (or just want fewer awkward moments), here’s what not to do on a first date in 2025—and what to do instead to set yourself up for a great second one.
TL;DR
- Pick a comfortable, mutually suitable spot and plan for the best possible outcome.
- Match the vibe with your outfit and energy; be present, not robotic.
- Keep your phone away and your manners on display.
- Consider low-alcohol or alcohol-free options and budget-friendly activities.
- Prioritize safety: verify your profile and let a friend know your plans.
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What You Should Not Do On A First Date
1) Choose The Destination At Random
Where you go for your date can make or break it, so get to know what your date likes and tailor the location. If they’re vegetarian, don’t take them to a BBQ joint. If you don’t drink, skip the bar crawl. Choose somewhere both of you will feel comfortable. Low-key or alcohol-free options are trending and take the pressure down.
2) Act Like a Robot
Your match agreed to a date with a human, so act like one. Don’t rehearse every line or treat the conversation like a performance. Be present, listen, and respond naturally—no scripts, no robotic energy.
3) Move At The Wrong Speed
If one person’s already picking wedding venues while the other’s just testing chemistry, it’s a mismatch. Be upfront about your intentions—whether you want something casual or serious—and move at a pace that feels right for both of you.
4) Plan Only For The Worst, Not For The Best
You might prepare for awkward silences or exits, but what if the date goes great? Plan for the best-case scenario too. Know your schedule so you can suggest a second date, and tidy up your place just in case. Follow up after the date—it shows genuine interest.
5) Dress Inappropriately For The Vibe
Dress for the occasion and the environment. You don’t need to overdress or underdress—just match the setting and make sure you feel confident and comfortable.
6) Go On About Your Ex
There’s no faster way to kill first-date chemistry than talking about your ex. Whether it’s praise or complaints, save that history for later. Focus on the person in front of you.
7) Only Talk About Yourself
Yes, your job and hobbies are interesting—but make sure your date gets airtime too. Balance the conversation. Ask questions, listen, and show interest in what they say.
8) Only Ask Questions
Don’t turn the conversation into an interrogation. Ask questions naturally, share your own stories, and let the dialogue flow both ways.
9) Get Too Drunk
If you’re not great at handling your alcohol, don’t drink too much. You’ll risk saying or doing something you regret. Alcohol-free and “damp” dates are popular now—being sharp and present always beats being sloppy.
10) Look At Your Phone All Night
Constantly checking your phone signals boredom or disinterest. Keep it out of sight and give your date your full attention. No scrolling, no app checks, and definitely no checking new matches.
11) Be Rude To Anyone
How you treat servers or staff says a lot about you. Being polite, kind, and respectful is non-negotiable. If your date is rude to others, take it as a red flag.
12) Only Disclose What You Hate
Negativity is exhausting. Try focusing on things you love instead of ranting about what you hate. It keeps the mood upbeat and shows enthusiasm for life.
13) Order Lobster
It might sound fancy, but lobster and other messy meals are risky first-date choices. Save complicated dishes for later. Stick to simple, shareable options that let you focus on the conversation instead of fighting with your food.
How To Get Better At First Dates
This list covers what not to do, but great first dates are about maximizing the positives. Pick a creative, comfortable activity, be curious, and relax. Practice helps—going on more dates takes the pressure off each one. If things aren’t clicking, try apps or settings that better match what you’re looking for. And remember to use verification tools, share your location with a friend, and prioritize your safety.
Safety & Logistics Tips for 2025
- Verification is normal. Most dating apps now offer or require photo or ID verification. Use it—it helps prevent scams.
- Share your plans. Tell a trusted friend where you’re going, and use in-app “Share Date” or your phone’s Check In feature.
- Protect your data. Don’t share ID photos or private details with unverified links or third-party apps.
FAQ
Is it okay to suggest a sober or one-drink max first date now?
Absolutely. Alcohol-free and low-alcohol dates are trending because they keep things relaxed and authentic.
Should I verify my profile before the first date?
Yes, verification badges are now common and show you take safety seriously. It builds trust before you even meet.
What’s the best way to follow up after a great first date?
Send a quick message referencing something fun you talked about and suggest another meetup soon after.
Are cheaper activity dates a red flag?
Not at all. Walks, coffee, or local events are low-pressure and perfect for conversation. It’s about connection, not cost.
Any smart safety steps before meeting?
Meet in public, share your plan with a friend, and use app safety tools to track your arrival and check-in.
Are video first dates still popular?
Yes, but short in-person meetings are preferred now. They help you gauge chemistry faster without endless online chatting.
