How To Get Dates On Tinder
Congratulations. It’s finally time to set up your Tinder date. If you’ve stumbled upon this article to find out how to get a date on Tinder you’re in the right place. Although, I strongly suggest you read the two articles that have preceded this. They both include imperative steps to dramatically increase your chance of getting dates on Tinder. First, check out this article about ‘Planting The Seed.’ A step that will definitely set yourself up for success and land you way more dates on Tinder than before. After that, I highly advise that you read our post on when you should start even considering setting up your Tinder dates.
Going forward with this article, I’m going to assume you’ve read the article on ‘planting a seed’, which is imperative. If you’ve already read the above two articles before this, remember, ‘planting the seed’ means making a casual, loose plan early on.
For the sake of this article, let’s just run with an example of getting drinks for a first date. This is because it’s probably the most common and the following steps can easily be replicated for other dates.
There are a couple of components, I believe, that you can follow to help yourself out. This might not be for everyone, but if you really do have a tough time getting dates on Tinder, let’s see what we can do.
First Step To Planning Dates On Tinder: Get Idea Of Free Time
Jumping in and trying to set up a concrete plan, straight after your match has said yes to potentially hanging out could be a little too forward. That means once you say, “we should hang out sometime” (from when you ‘planted a seed’) give it enough time before you actually ask her out. You want to let the idea of a Tinder date with you simmer. It’s best to try to keep your match on their toes just enough that you won’t become predictable and seem like you only want to catch up for one thing.
The first thing to help your chances of actually going on this Tinder date with your match is to find out how their schedule is looking in the near future.
You possibly could have just matched with someone who is looking for a brief 5-minute distraction before going back to studying for the most important exam of her life. If you jumped right in and asked her to hang out tomorrow, and she had an exam that day, you have already set yourself off on the wrong foot. But, if you got a gauge, found out when she was going to have her final exam, then you could plan something for a day you know she will most likely be free. Makes sense right?
If you ask how their week is looking, and they respond saying they don’t have any plans, then this is a good indication that your match shouldn’t have anything getting in the way of you asking them out.
Second Step To Planning Dates On Tinder: Get A Gauge
On the day (or the day before) you want to meet up with your match, get in contact and see what her plans are. This will give you a good gauge of whether or not she might want to see you.
It could be as simple as asking:
“hey, what are you getting up to tomorrow night/ tonight?”
The fact that you are asking this after you have already planted the seed of catching up will usually mean she knows what’s coming. What I mean by that is she is probably expecting you to ask her out. So, she wouldn’t respond saying she is doing absolutely nothing if she didn’t want to see you. If she is saying she has no plans at all, then the time is right. If she does have plans, please don’t be turned off and think your chances are done. She might just actually be busy.
You only have a select number of times to ask her out and you don’t want to be the guy asking every single time you two speak. You are being more intuitive by picking up on the fact that she might be busy, which she will appreciate.
Like we spoke in the previous article about knowing when the time is right, look out for any responses that might point towards her wanting to see you.
I personally suggest to my clients to ask this at least half a day prior to the proposed time, rather than making it seem like a last minute attempt at seeing them.
Third Step To Planning Dates On Tinder: Telling Not Asking
Remember what I said earlier about changing around your language? Changing it around just a little can really help your cause to get a date from Tinder.
Let’s look at option A & B:
- Would you like to get a drink?
- We should go get a drink!
Let’s not over think this too much, but just that little shift in language from A to B could be the last thing to help you get over the line.
Now I know what some of you might be thinking: 1. It’s a little forceful just outright saying what she should do, and 2. You aren’t exactly giving her a chance to say yes by not actually asking a question. Don’t worry, I’m getting to that.
Fourth Step To Planning Dates On Tinder: Make An Excuse
So remember, earlier you would have asked your match what her plans were? Yes, of course, this was to see if she would, in fact, be available before we make plans, but her response can also help you seem as if you have a reason or “excuse” to catch up.
For example, let’s say once you ask what her plans are, your match responds with:
You could respond with:
Fifth Step To Planning Dates On Tinder: Call To Action
Yes, I know I still haven’t addressed the fact that you aren’t exactly asking your match a question. Believe it or not, your match will actually get that you are asking her, but sometimes the point can be made clearer, by giving them a call to action.
What I mean by this, is following up our date request, with a question. For example: “What do you think?”
This allows you to show that you are in fact seriously asking her out on a date, and not making another throwaway statement about hanging out.
If she’s into you and not busy, you should get a solid yes. Good job dude.
Now, I know what some of you are thinking. That the above sounds a little like a “scientific method.” Trust me, I hear you. Please remember that Tinder and all online dating apps should be relaxed and fun. The above is just a series of steps that my “hack brain” couldn’t help subconsciously formulate after going on literally hundreds of Tinder dates. So if you are someone that has struggled with getting Tinder dates, then give it a go. But if you feel like the above wouldn’t suit you, or you don’t need any help to get a date on Tinder, that’s fine as well. I really hope this helps at least one person overcome the stress of trying to get a date from Tinder or any online dating app for that matter. Good luck dude!
When she says yes, and are thinking you want to try something other than going for drinks, check out this article I’ve written on some of the best ideas on where to go for your first Tinder date.